Willis on the Welfare
03-20-2005, 10:34 PM
Time for the last two recaps of the season. Lots of drunk people from The Hat and they even brought their god-awful ugly mascot. The full recap coming up but first a......
Willis rant:
The following story is based on a story I heard third hand. For that reason I will not include the name of the player involved or the establishment it happened in.
Last week a WHL veteran was in a local lounge and was asked to show ID. Upon this request he got all, I'm ****** ***** *******, much like the Rick James skit on the Chapelle show (http://www.funfry.com/showphoto.php/photo/2510/password/sort/1/size/medium/cat/691/page/)
This player went on a tirade about how ****ty Swift Current is and how great his hometown is. He got all upset that there was nothing to do in Swift (my suggestion would be go out and meet some fans). Would you like to know the difference between a future superstar and a never will be? Joe Sakic, Marc Habscheid, Tiger Williams, Bryan Trottier, Danny Lambert, Patrick Marleau and many other pro players all came through Swift Current in one form or another during their hockey career, and all still come back. Swift Current is a small town with not much more to do than get drunk and go to the bowling alley, but MANY NHL STARS still visit because this city will BUILD CHARACTER. ALL YOU COCKY YOUNG BUCKS WHO THINK SWIFT CURRENT IS JUST A ****HOLE SPEEDBUMP ON YOUR WAY TO SUPERSTARDOM NEED TO RECOGNIZE THAT THIS CITY WILL HELP YOU TO GREATNESS IF YOU LET IT. Go play in Calgary and go to a different nightclub every night, and bang all the hotties your Johnson will allow it that's important to you, but recognize what playing hockey in Swift Current will do for you if you do it right. RESPECT THIS CITY!
rant over.
Broncos vs. Tigers, March 18.
Scratches: Tigers; Nastiuk (had a cast on his wrist), Glass, Lukin and Tremblay. Broncos: Fransoo (on crutches), Knebl, LaRochelle (head), Leckovic (redneck).
Starting Lineups: Broncos: Moir, Rumsey, Cruse, Horman, Desloges, Hunter.
Tigers: Keetley ( I can't help but cheer this kid. Last year he got no ice time, so he dropped 40+pounds in the off season and this year has made Nastiuk his *****!), Marr, Blanshan, Meyer, Robertson, Psurny.
RRoary the Tiger mascot is in town, and I'm guessing by the way he's acting he lost the drinking games on the fan bus. Charlie Horse comes out and tries to beat his drum but hits the WRONG SIDE OF THE DRUM!!! Rroary is in Charlie's head, the Tigers have already won one battle.
Rroary and Charlie hug at center ice. Looks like they're going to play nice tonite. Pussies.
Special announcement about Horman and Cruse graduating. It looks like they were supposed to get some sort of presentation but poor Zimmerman is left standing like a goof with two gifts and no announcement.
The puck drops and we're under way. Sold out crowd!!! It is LOUD IN THE BUIDLING. Tiger fans are louder to start. Good effort by Smackit and friends however :clap:
Good pace in the 1st period. Broncos come out flying and get some quick shots on goal until a momentum killer from guess who? (http://www.scbroncos.com/team/players/schulz.html)
Schulz jumps Dorsett and throws some punches. Dorsett gets the gloves off but Schulz's sneak attack gives him the upper hand in the bout. This did however put the Broncos short handed for FOUR MINUTES for roughing and instigating.
AWESOME POWERPLAY vs. AWESOME PENALTY KILL.
The bad news, the Broncos are shorthanded for four minutes. The good news, Schulz won't be involved in this PK.
Great kill by the Broncos. Moir is awesome, the PK is awesome. Crowd is hot. This may have been the best four minutes of the hockey game.
Period ends scoreless.
1st Intermission:
The fire alarm goes off. The fire department shows up complete with thermal imaging camera and full gear. The Zamboni cannot come out while the fire alarm is going so we get a TWENTY FIVE MINUTE INTERMISSION.
Time for the early bird draw in the goals for education lottery. Our favorite radio host Ryan Switzer (http://www.eagle94.com/page_13509.html) takes to the ice arm and arm with Mayor Sandy Larson. Switzer tries to make Sandy look like a hockey fan buy asking who her favorite Bronco is and she attempts the LUUUUUUKE. Maybe if she went to more than one game a year that line could have been delivered better. $25,000 goes to......SOME CLOWN FROM MOOSE JAW. He should donate it to a new rink for Moose Jaw.
2nd period.
Back to my seat with a cold beer in hand and theeeeeyyyyyy score. Darren Helm alone in front of the net puts home a rebound with more grease on it than Standard Motors (never rip off Willis). Has anyone else noticed that since we traded Trojovksy the opposition HAS THEIR WAY IN FRONT OF OUR NET!?!?! No wonder Moir is so solid at controlling rebounds.
Helm from Blanshan at 4:30, 1-0 Tigers
The lack of Bronco offence is showing as the Broncos are getting NO WHERE NEAR THE GOAL. Moir is his usual solid self.
Broncos try to get some offence but David Schlemko finds Brett Robertson with a breakaway pass and theeeeeeyyyyyy score. I like Schlemko. Tigers have some good young talent. The days of McArthur, Meyer and Marr may be over soon, but don't write these guys for next year.
Robertson from Schlemko and Meyer @ 12:00, 2-0 Tigers
Does Cam Barker still play for the Hat? He'll only get worse Hat fans. When he shows up to the rink in a $65,000 Cadillac SUV, TRADE HIM!!!
Some pushing and shoving here and there. Broncos generate ZERO OFFENCE. Matt Keetley is BORED in goal and almost falls off the wagon and orders a hot dog.
Intermission:
Some elimination draw contest is going on, but Rroary and Charlie are stealing the spotlight by diving into the boards head first. Charlie is getting shown up in his own rink big time!!! Rroary does a THIRTY SECOND HAND-STAND. Charlie should beat Rroary in a fake fight. Have Charlie get some sort of WWE style victory at center ice to get the Bronco fans going. Charlie could go to Medicine Hat the next night and get beat up by Rroary. That ideology has made Vince McMahon a BILLIONAIRE. This friendly cooperative mascot **** is just annoying.
Third period.
Not much to recap. Schulz and Dorsett have a rematch. Dorsett gies the upper hand. Schulz's punches are soft. They have no wind up or follow through. EVEN LUKE HUNTER PUNCHES TO HURT WHEN THE GLOVES ARE OFF!!! Schulz's indifference is getting on my nerves.
A Tiger fans gets kicked out for attacking Rroary. Is that really what happened? I didn't see it. You guys need to learn to drink in moderation.
The sheer lack of officiating in this league is shown late in the period as Horman EATS AN ELBOW from Tommy Maxwell without a call. Horman is busted up, and CUSSING A BLUE STREAK AT THE REF. Horman is pissed, the Bronco fans are pissed, Horman gives the ref (who looks like he may be 21 years old) the ONE FINGER SALUTE and leaves the WHL for good. Trevor Hrycuik is the ref if anyone is planning on sending hate mail to the league.
You know what else pisses me off? You go to a game in Calgary and for refs you get Rob Matsuoka (best in the league). The next night in the Hat it's Chris Savage (reffed at world juniors). The two top refs in the league. To the best of my knowledge Matsuoka hasn't even been to Swift, and Savage hasn't been here since before Christmas. Why does the league give Swift Current these just out of puberty, clueless Trevor Hrycuiks, Ryan Thompsons and Regan Vetters when the GOOD OFFCIALS are all sent to the larger markets. Why does everyone in the league treat Swift like a second class market? I don't know if I should complain to Kevin Muench or the league head office but for next year QUIT SENDING THESE TRAINEES TO SWIFT CURRENT and throw us MATSUOKA AND SAVAGE FOR A CHANGE!!!
Sorry, back to the game.
Bronco goal is empty they try like crazy to score, but don't. Swift crowd and Tiger fans treat the Broncos to a standing ovation.
2-0 Tigers is your final.
3 stars:
1. Horman and Cruse (perk of playing last game)
3. Moir (33 saves)
Nice to meet Grumphy in the lobby prior to the game. Best of luck in the playoffs, sorry I missed you on Saturday.
A full Saturday game recap tomorrow or Tuesday. Sorry I've been shaky on the recaps.
Willi$
Willis rant:
The following story is based on a story I heard third hand. For that reason I will not include the name of the player involved or the establishment it happened in.
Last week a WHL veteran was in a local lounge and was asked to show ID. Upon this request he got all, I'm ****** ***** *******, much like the Rick James skit on the Chapelle show (http://www.funfry.com/showphoto.php/photo/2510/password/sort/1/size/medium/cat/691/page/)
This player went on a tirade about how ****ty Swift Current is and how great his hometown is. He got all upset that there was nothing to do in Swift (my suggestion would be go out and meet some fans). Would you like to know the difference between a future superstar and a never will be? Joe Sakic, Marc Habscheid, Tiger Williams, Bryan Trottier, Danny Lambert, Patrick Marleau and many other pro players all came through Swift Current in one form or another during their hockey career, and all still come back. Swift Current is a small town with not much more to do than get drunk and go to the bowling alley, but MANY NHL STARS still visit because this city will BUILD CHARACTER. ALL YOU COCKY YOUNG BUCKS WHO THINK SWIFT CURRENT IS JUST A ****HOLE SPEEDBUMP ON YOUR WAY TO SUPERSTARDOM NEED TO RECOGNIZE THAT THIS CITY WILL HELP YOU TO GREATNESS IF YOU LET IT. Go play in Calgary and go to a different nightclub every night, and bang all the hotties your Johnson will allow it that's important to you, but recognize what playing hockey in Swift Current will do for you if you do it right. RESPECT THIS CITY!
rant over.
Broncos vs. Tigers, March 18.
Scratches: Tigers; Nastiuk (had a cast on his wrist), Glass, Lukin and Tremblay. Broncos: Fransoo (on crutches), Knebl, LaRochelle (head), Leckovic (redneck).
Starting Lineups: Broncos: Moir, Rumsey, Cruse, Horman, Desloges, Hunter.
Tigers: Keetley ( I can't help but cheer this kid. Last year he got no ice time, so he dropped 40+pounds in the off season and this year has made Nastiuk his *****!), Marr, Blanshan, Meyer, Robertson, Psurny.
RRoary the Tiger mascot is in town, and I'm guessing by the way he's acting he lost the drinking games on the fan bus. Charlie Horse comes out and tries to beat his drum but hits the WRONG SIDE OF THE DRUM!!! Rroary is in Charlie's head, the Tigers have already won one battle.
Rroary and Charlie hug at center ice. Looks like they're going to play nice tonite. Pussies.
Special announcement about Horman and Cruse graduating. It looks like they were supposed to get some sort of presentation but poor Zimmerman is left standing like a goof with two gifts and no announcement.
The puck drops and we're under way. Sold out crowd!!! It is LOUD IN THE BUIDLING. Tiger fans are louder to start. Good effort by Smackit and friends however :clap:
Good pace in the 1st period. Broncos come out flying and get some quick shots on goal until a momentum killer from guess who? (http://www.scbroncos.com/team/players/schulz.html)
Schulz jumps Dorsett and throws some punches. Dorsett gets the gloves off but Schulz's sneak attack gives him the upper hand in the bout. This did however put the Broncos short handed for FOUR MINUTES for roughing and instigating.
AWESOME POWERPLAY vs. AWESOME PENALTY KILL.
The bad news, the Broncos are shorthanded for four minutes. The good news, Schulz won't be involved in this PK.
Great kill by the Broncos. Moir is awesome, the PK is awesome. Crowd is hot. This may have been the best four minutes of the hockey game.
Period ends scoreless.
1st Intermission:
The fire alarm goes off. The fire department shows up complete with thermal imaging camera and full gear. The Zamboni cannot come out while the fire alarm is going so we get a TWENTY FIVE MINUTE INTERMISSION.
Time for the early bird draw in the goals for education lottery. Our favorite radio host Ryan Switzer (http://www.eagle94.com/page_13509.html) takes to the ice arm and arm with Mayor Sandy Larson. Switzer tries to make Sandy look like a hockey fan buy asking who her favorite Bronco is and she attempts the LUUUUUUKE. Maybe if she went to more than one game a year that line could have been delivered better. $25,000 goes to......SOME CLOWN FROM MOOSE JAW. He should donate it to a new rink for Moose Jaw.
2nd period.
Back to my seat with a cold beer in hand and theeeeeyyyyyy score. Darren Helm alone in front of the net puts home a rebound with more grease on it than Standard Motors (never rip off Willis). Has anyone else noticed that since we traded Trojovksy the opposition HAS THEIR WAY IN FRONT OF OUR NET!?!?! No wonder Moir is so solid at controlling rebounds.
Helm from Blanshan at 4:30, 1-0 Tigers
The lack of Bronco offence is showing as the Broncos are getting NO WHERE NEAR THE GOAL. Moir is his usual solid self.
Broncos try to get some offence but David Schlemko finds Brett Robertson with a breakaway pass and theeeeeeyyyyyy score. I like Schlemko. Tigers have some good young talent. The days of McArthur, Meyer and Marr may be over soon, but don't write these guys for next year.
Robertson from Schlemko and Meyer @ 12:00, 2-0 Tigers
Does Cam Barker still play for the Hat? He'll only get worse Hat fans. When he shows up to the rink in a $65,000 Cadillac SUV, TRADE HIM!!!
Some pushing and shoving here and there. Broncos generate ZERO OFFENCE. Matt Keetley is BORED in goal and almost falls off the wagon and orders a hot dog.
Intermission:
Some elimination draw contest is going on, but Rroary and Charlie are stealing the spotlight by diving into the boards head first. Charlie is getting shown up in his own rink big time!!! Rroary does a THIRTY SECOND HAND-STAND. Charlie should beat Rroary in a fake fight. Have Charlie get some sort of WWE style victory at center ice to get the Bronco fans going. Charlie could go to Medicine Hat the next night and get beat up by Rroary. That ideology has made Vince McMahon a BILLIONAIRE. This friendly cooperative mascot **** is just annoying.
Third period.
Not much to recap. Schulz and Dorsett have a rematch. Dorsett gies the upper hand. Schulz's punches are soft. They have no wind up or follow through. EVEN LUKE HUNTER PUNCHES TO HURT WHEN THE GLOVES ARE OFF!!! Schulz's indifference is getting on my nerves.
A Tiger fans gets kicked out for attacking Rroary. Is that really what happened? I didn't see it. You guys need to learn to drink in moderation.
The sheer lack of officiating in this league is shown late in the period as Horman EATS AN ELBOW from Tommy Maxwell without a call. Horman is busted up, and CUSSING A BLUE STREAK AT THE REF. Horman is pissed, the Bronco fans are pissed, Horman gives the ref (who looks like he may be 21 years old) the ONE FINGER SALUTE and leaves the WHL for good. Trevor Hrycuik is the ref if anyone is planning on sending hate mail to the league.
You know what else pisses me off? You go to a game in Calgary and for refs you get Rob Matsuoka (best in the league). The next night in the Hat it's Chris Savage (reffed at world juniors). The two top refs in the league. To the best of my knowledge Matsuoka hasn't even been to Swift, and Savage hasn't been here since before Christmas. Why does the league give Swift Current these just out of puberty, clueless Trevor Hrycuiks, Ryan Thompsons and Regan Vetters when the GOOD OFFCIALS are all sent to the larger markets. Why does everyone in the league treat Swift like a second class market? I don't know if I should complain to Kevin Muench or the league head office but for next year QUIT SENDING THESE TRAINEES TO SWIFT CURRENT and throw us MATSUOKA AND SAVAGE FOR A CHANGE!!!
Sorry, back to the game.
Bronco goal is empty they try like crazy to score, but don't. Swift crowd and Tiger fans treat the Broncos to a standing ovation.
2-0 Tigers is your final.
3 stars:
1. Horman and Cruse (perk of playing last game)
3. Moir (33 saves)
Nice to meet Grumphy in the lobby prior to the game. Best of luck in the playoffs, sorry I missed you on Saturday.
A full Saturday game recap tomorrow or Tuesday. Sorry I've been shaky on the recaps.
Willi$