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Willis on the Welfare
02-10-2005, 02:47 AM
Scout asked me to do a recap and because I love you, the fans, I will treat this seriously and try my best on my first recap:

The stage is set for tonite's contest, the lights are dim, and the announcer introduces..................Charlie Horse!!!! He slides on his knees out to center ice and beats his drum...Charlie then gets up and dances to the music, but not in a crazy mascot dance kind of way, more like a shy guy at Caddyshack kind of way. Charlie dances like you did in grade 7. Charlie's dancing is sad to watch and urges me not to cheer at all. I think even the mascot is thinking next year.

Scratches. Kamloops: Jasovsky, Olson, Richards, Chorneyko. Jasovsky and Richards are concussions, Olson and Chorneyko healthy.

Broncos: Marc Defoe, RJ Larochelle, Michael Szcachor (must be nice to move all the way from Texas to Swift Current and have the 7th man get more ice)

Don Cherry's voice then booms over the PA system "led by goaltender #30 Kyle Moir here's your SWIFT CURRENT BRONCOS!!!!"

All 27 fans in the building cheer. I think we may have broken a record for worst attendance ever!!!

Let's drop the puck, Sauer, Aspenlind, Leovold, Rumsey and Cruse vs. Tesliuk, Bender, Gutierrez, Delaronde and Jorgenson.

Kamloops wins the faceoff crashes the net and :43 seconds in THEEEEEYYYYYY score. Jorgenson from Bender and Gutierrez

I am listening to the play by play on my walkman and I don't care what you think about the guy but Jon Keen will someday call games in the show. The way he gets all disgusted at an opposition goal is MONEY IN THE BANK!!!

Kamloops 1-0 at 43 seconds. In the first period the Broncos get a powerplay and it sucks.... Bad. Nothing else interesting happened in the 1st.

As the teams leave the ice I'm reminded of the good old days when Ken Hitchcock coached the Blazers. After each period he had to walk across the ice to the old dressing rooms. Hitchcock weighed in at waaaaaay more than 400 lbs at the time. Our organ player (Keith Miyashiro) would play the A&W root bear theme as he crossed the ice and ol' Hitchcock hated that with the fire of a thousand suns. It's amazing how Hitch has dropped about 2 hundred pounds since then. He did it because of the Swift Current organist I tell you!!! Everytime Hitch looks in the mirror he says "DAMN YOU KEITH MIYASHIRO, DAMN YOU TO HELL, LOOK AT ME KNOW YOU SON OF A......" and then he does 500 crunches.

All I'm saying is the hockey world owes a skinny Ken Hitchcock to Swift Current. He would have died of a heart attack had it not been for us. Best coach of the modern era owes his life to Speedy Creek. There's a lesson kids, in every negative there is a positive.

1-0 Kamloops after 1

Broncos had 9 shots, Kamloops had 8. We killed off a penalty damn good too.

Penalties Hengen Slashing SC, Gentile Holding Kam.

Intermission:

We have a large man from BP's come ut to center Ice to have his head shaved. We get three minutes of gratuitious announcements about how good BP's is for raising money for the red cross and then they try to shave this large man's head. The clippers dont' work and after about three minutes of trying to shave this poor lummox someone from the Broncos promotions staff comes out to tell everyone to get off the ice so we can flood it. Couldn't they give away t-shirts?

For those who care the rink attendant is wearing blue jeans and a bunny hug with some sort of hippie logo on it, along with a hat that he must have purchased at that C4 store. How professional.

The zamboni driver must have heard our crititcism from the blue board and is not dressed like a hippie who is just waiting for the construction of the new skatepark. Baby steps I say.

2nd period.

Broncos are scared to throw a body check. Aspenlind is playing aggressvie and that's all. Kassian comes on the ice and Swift ****'s their pants. This guy is massive!!! I wish Trojovksy was still here, then maybe we wouldn't be scared to throw a hit on these guys. Kassian is a monster, this guy will not be able to find anyone to fight next year due to the league being scared ****less of him. Kassian cannot skate but that doesn't matter. Leckovic has not thrown a hit all game. Rumsey is already -1 and not as physical as he has been. Kassian is pure imtimidation. Broncos catch a break and Kassian get's two minutes for "holding the opponent's stick" which sounds funny when the PA announcer says it. Broncos out shoot Kamloops 12-11, both teams 0/2 on the powerplay, Broncos blow a 5 on 3 against one of the worst PK's in the league. Dubnyk is awesome in goal for the Loops robbing Horman. Broncos are not working hard.

Penalties: Lloyd interferance, Rumsey Roughing SC. Kassian Holding the stick, Kauk roughing, Tesliuk, Hooking

Intermission: The Ford Car that they are pimping to the audience spins out of control on thie ice. Considering the roads are never icy in Saskatchewan why should that matter?


3rd Period, SCORE A DAMN GOAL!!!

Broncos begin on a short power play but Kamloops out works us. I sense we are about to get shut out. Boring game, no one is hitting, no one is taking risks. 8:41 in THEEEEEYYYYYY score. Reid Jorgenson unassisted. Kamloops gets lucky and scores a garbage goal with David Schulz on the ice.

That's all she wrote. For a few seconds Myles Rumsey and Bryan Kauk were on the ice doing battle behind the net and I was hoping for a fight.

Rumsey and Kauk.

Rhum and Coke.....

A screw it, awful game, awful crowd, if only 1,200 fans show up it must be hard for the guys to get motivated.

Penalties, Hunter roughing, Brisebois Roughing SC. Grochmal roughing, Tesliuk Hooking, Sagert Roughing KAM.

Kamloops 2 Swift Current 0

3 Stars

1. Reid Jorgenson (Two goals)
2. Devan Dubnyk (30 save shutout)
3. Jerrid Sauer (token Bronco star, should have been Gutierrez)

The boys worked hard at times. Desloges, Hunter and Horman made some scoring chances, but Dubnyk was solid.

The PK looked great. Sauer is a machine.

That's all

Willi$

Scout
02-10-2005, 06:40 AM
Thanks for the recap.

Scout

grumphy
02-10-2005, 09:27 AM
Now that was a recap ----- very unbias, thanks & congrats :D

kelownakarl
02-10-2005, 10:06 AM
Nice recap, a good little read!

Sammy
02-10-2005, 10:50 AM
bud, that was one entertaining review!

Spungy
02-10-2005, 01:16 PM
great take on the game. I can't wait to read a recap you do on an exciting game!

bronco rep
02-10-2005, 05:57 PM
I have never heard anything so true.

Flathead
02-10-2005, 09:00 PM
It was the boringest game I've seen in years. Perfect road game for Kamloops.

fightstrap50
02-10-2005, 10:14 PM
thats the way to post willis.thats a great recap