Willis on the Welfare
02-20-2005, 10:49 PM
Broncos vs. Canes Feb. 19, 2005
Good crowd. Redenbach's return is helping attendace. Too bad no one came to see him WHEN HE WAS A BRONCO!!!
Here comes CHARLIE HORSE. It's his birthday. I hope for his birthday someone gets him tapes of Gainer the Gopher, the San Diego Chicken, Vulk or any other half decent mascot. Charlie needs to learn what the hell to do in that horse suit besides bang a drum and dance like a 23 year old virgin! What happened to all the other mascots coming for Charlie's birthday? The Root Bear? Fat Cat ? Spend some money and bring in Harvey the Hound from Calgary, what the hell else is he going to do?
Scatches: Swift Current; RJ Larochelle (concussion), Marek Knebl (proper use of a euro) Mike Hengen (almost killed in practice) and Leckovic (healthy). Lethbridge; Brennan Chapman (knee) and Kenny Petkau (knee)
A few hundred empty seats just before the faceoff. To fill those last few hundred seats the Broncos should give tickets to Yellow Horn's family. It would a) raise the noise level b) fill the building c) get the old farts in Swift prepared for life with a casino.
DROP THE PUCK: Moir, Rumsey, Lloyd, Sauer, Leovold and Hunter for Swift. Sorochan, Mezei, Seabrook, Versteeg, Lammers and Redenbach for the Canes.
Redenbach vs. Hunter on the draw. Both have **** eating grins as they take the draw. Redenbach wins the faceoff CLEANLY.
Great first period, end to end, faced pace, neither team giving an inch. Horman has looked great. He burnes Ashton HARD early on but ran out of room at the goal. Ashton had a tan after that. Each team has one shot in the first ten minutes, but this game is fast. Schenderling takes a boarding call. HOLY CRAP LOOK AT THIS LETHBRIDGE POWERPLAY: Redenbach, Filewich, Yellow Horn, Seabrook and Lammers! Swift killed that off awesome. Jerrid Sauer rocks the PK. Redenbach tried his damndest to put on a show but Sauer was watching him like a mennonite watches a dollar.
Who the hell is this Levi Nelson? He's playing with Brisbois and Murray and they're looking good. I've never met someone named Levi outside of a Hutterite colony. Do you think Chynoweth will receive a gift of rhubarb wine and a few coils of deer sausage for playing this kid?
First period is over. Swift has got to be happy with that.
INTERMISSION:
Minor hockey challenge time as we have a small team with Zellers jerseys taking on a much bigger team in logoless Senator jerseys. Is the Zellers team folding at the end of the month?
Most of these kids have the obesely expensive Easton synergy sticks! THEY'RE NINE YEARS OLD AND PLAYING WITH $200 TWIGS!!! That's a couple hundred bucks in sticks per season! It would be an embarassment to have a twenty dollar wooden Sher-wood nowadays. I officially will never be able to afford to have my kids in hockey. A pair of running shoes and shin guards is sure looking good right now. It ain't just Bettman that's killing the game folks.
Zamboni Driver is in a Bronco jacket. Good work. Net guy is old and takes too long to do maitenance. We're ready to start the second period and this guy is slowly making his way to do the Lethbridge goal. Sorochan wants to clean the crease but has an old man with ASS CRACK cleaning out the peg holes!!!
Just on a side note before we get to the 2nd period, WHERE THE HELL ARE OUR ALDERMEN AND MAYOR? They all talk about how important the Broncos are to the city and blah, blah, blah, but I have yet too see Sandy Larson or the aldermen at a hockey game! Jerrod Schafer will show up now and then but that's it. Sandy Larson will show up at the awards banquet, make a speech which will ooze of fake sincerity and then leave. Don't defend them by saying they're expanding the Civic Center to save the Broncos either. They're only doing that because our last mayor did nothing more than star in movies at the Rodeway Inn. This council just wants to make changes just for the sake of making changes. Everytime our mayor misses a Bronco game she puts another "arse" in Larson!
2nd Period:
Redenbach continues to beat Hunter on faceoffs. Seriously, Redenbach 5 Hunter 0
Shawn Mezei takes a roughing penalty to put the Broncos on the PP early. Broncos powerplay is the worst in the league. Horman and Hunter storm the goal, here comes Desloges, centering feed SCOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRESSSS!!! HOLY **** A POWERPLAY GOAL BY SWIFT CURRENT. IS THE UNIVERSE ABOUT TO IMPLODE ON ITSELF?
1-0 Swift Current
Desloges from Horman and Hunter. Tell me we didn't SCREW EVERETT ROTTEN ON THE LEAVITT/ANNESLEY DEAL.
Broncos are playing hard and out working Lethbridge. The big guns for the Canes have done nothing. Swift is outworking them and taking it to them.
Yellow Horn/Filewich/Pess are on the ice. They are cycling the puck but getting no shots on goal. Yellow Horn banks a shot off Rumsey's skate theeeeyyyy score. Yellow Horn gets the goal with the assists going to Pess, Filewich and the HORSESHOE UP HIS *****!!!
1-1
Great shift buy the Broncos right after the goal. Levi Nelson is a HOUSE OF FIRE! Broncos crash the goal, Murray, Brisebois and Nelson, NELSON SCOOOOOOORRRRESSSSS!!!! WHERE DID WE FIND THIS KID? . The Futrue looks good. Nelson, Bortis, Leovold, Wasmuth, Brisebois, Sauer. Everything's gonna be alright
Scored with Seabrook on the ice no less.
Nelson from Brisebois and Murray. Murray has done a fine job of saying BOOYAH to Darren Stocker tonite.
2-1 Swift
Trevor Peeters on the bench is not wearing the hat tonite. I know Trevor is the son of NHL legend Pete Peeters, but is it just me or does he look more like Mike Ridley?
Broncos dominate until late in the period when Brisebois gets that disease that makes you take dumb penalites at key moments. The same one that sidelined Leckovic tonite. Canes on the PP Yellow Horn finds Filewich, across the crease theeeeyyyy score. Why Yellow Horn missed the top prospect game is beyond me. 17 years old and leading the top junior aged league in North American in scoring. Filewich from the 1st Nation Sensation and Lammers to end the period.
2-2 tie
Penalties Brisbois, hooking then holding minutes later for Swift. Mezei for roughing, Kodman for holding for Lethbridge.
INTERMISSION:
Boring shoot out contest that no one ever wins. next.
Frozen t-shirt contest. Charlie Horse does a lap THROWING SHIRTS INTO THE CROWD. Did I not suggest that in the last recap? It's the contest where you have to put on a frozen t-shirt and run a race. We have a fat guy, a tall guy and a short guy. The FAT GUY WINS. He fires up the crowd as he crosses the finish. BEST INTERMISSION IN WEEKS! If they do something like that every game attendace will go up. It's the little things.
The old guy doing net maitenance takes forever. Again. Fans in sections M,N,O,P and parts of H get treated to more ass crack.
3rd Period:
I had a good feeling about this until 5:45 in when theeeeeeyyyyy score. Lethbridges fourth line just made Swift look like bantams. Kodman from Ruzicka and Ullrich.
3-2 Lethbridge
Broncos look deflated.
Lethbridges fourth line hits the ice again and theeeeyyyyyy score again. Who the hell are these guys? The Broncos made yellowhornfilewichpess and redenbachversteeglammers totally ineffective but Mike Ullrich, Neil Kodman and Martin Ruzicka are the death of them!?!?!? Broncs were playing so good. David Schulz needs to get pissed off and start throwing that 6'3 210 pound frame of his. If you put eggs in Schulz's shoulder pads at the start of the game, they'd still be intact after sixty minutes. He is too easy going. Why do linemen in football slap each other in the face? Why does Dion Phaneuf never smile? Forget about all the assault BS, but look at Todd Bertuzzi. That guy is a ball of rage. Pete Rose despite his gambling problems and all the other crap was one of the best athletes ever because he was always pissed off. An angry Schulz would be awesome.
4-2 Lethbridge
Thirty seconds later John Lammers spots Kris Versteeg. I'm not sure where the defense is but Versteeg skates out of the corner, makes a move on Kyle Moir, smiles at the girls in section H, strikes a pose for the cameras and scores. Good for Versteeg, ugly for the Broncos. Schulz wasn't on the ice for that one.
5-2 Lethbridge
Tyler Redenbach was announced as scoring the last goal. Either the hot dog I ate had weed in it or someone hit the Canadian room in the intermission.
Moir out, Peeters in. Mike Ridley is listening to the game online and yells out "THAT'S MY BOY!!!" (I'm joking and I apologize)
This was fun for two periods but the Broncos have given up. Oh ****, Marc Defoe on the ice with Redenbach's line. Theeeeeeeeyyyyy score. Versteeg again. Nice play by Lammers and Redenbach to set that one up.
6-2 Lethbridge.
FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT!!!
Michael Szcscachor and Mike Ullrich gear down. Ullrich looks hesitant, I don't think he wants to do this. Szcsachor opens up a TEXAS SIZED CAN OF WHOOP ASS!!! Ullrich was a big part of the Canes success and caps the night off with the Gordie Howe hat trick. Winner: Szcszachor Loser: Old people who hate the loud horn in the luxury boxes.
Let's wrap this up:
3 stars:
1. Leth, Neil Kodman (1 goal, 1 assist)
2. Leth, Kris Versteeg (2 goals)
3. SC, Levi Nelson (1st career goal)
Not sure if anyone else caught this but I SWEAR I HEARD KODMAN SAY F-*-*-K IN THE POST GAME SHOW. Anyone else catch that? Was it just the weed hot dogs?
Great game through two periods. Lethbridge will OWN the central unless Sutter out coaches them.
Willi$
Good crowd. Redenbach's return is helping attendace. Too bad no one came to see him WHEN HE WAS A BRONCO!!!
Here comes CHARLIE HORSE. It's his birthday. I hope for his birthday someone gets him tapes of Gainer the Gopher, the San Diego Chicken, Vulk or any other half decent mascot. Charlie needs to learn what the hell to do in that horse suit besides bang a drum and dance like a 23 year old virgin! What happened to all the other mascots coming for Charlie's birthday? The Root Bear? Fat Cat ? Spend some money and bring in Harvey the Hound from Calgary, what the hell else is he going to do?
Scatches: Swift Current; RJ Larochelle (concussion), Marek Knebl (proper use of a euro) Mike Hengen (almost killed in practice) and Leckovic (healthy). Lethbridge; Brennan Chapman (knee) and Kenny Petkau (knee)
A few hundred empty seats just before the faceoff. To fill those last few hundred seats the Broncos should give tickets to Yellow Horn's family. It would a) raise the noise level b) fill the building c) get the old farts in Swift prepared for life with a casino.
DROP THE PUCK: Moir, Rumsey, Lloyd, Sauer, Leovold and Hunter for Swift. Sorochan, Mezei, Seabrook, Versteeg, Lammers and Redenbach for the Canes.
Redenbach vs. Hunter on the draw. Both have **** eating grins as they take the draw. Redenbach wins the faceoff CLEANLY.
Great first period, end to end, faced pace, neither team giving an inch. Horman has looked great. He burnes Ashton HARD early on but ran out of room at the goal. Ashton had a tan after that. Each team has one shot in the first ten minutes, but this game is fast. Schenderling takes a boarding call. HOLY CRAP LOOK AT THIS LETHBRIDGE POWERPLAY: Redenbach, Filewich, Yellow Horn, Seabrook and Lammers! Swift killed that off awesome. Jerrid Sauer rocks the PK. Redenbach tried his damndest to put on a show but Sauer was watching him like a mennonite watches a dollar.
Who the hell is this Levi Nelson? He's playing with Brisbois and Murray and they're looking good. I've never met someone named Levi outside of a Hutterite colony. Do you think Chynoweth will receive a gift of rhubarb wine and a few coils of deer sausage for playing this kid?
First period is over. Swift has got to be happy with that.
INTERMISSION:
Minor hockey challenge time as we have a small team with Zellers jerseys taking on a much bigger team in logoless Senator jerseys. Is the Zellers team folding at the end of the month?
Most of these kids have the obesely expensive Easton synergy sticks! THEY'RE NINE YEARS OLD AND PLAYING WITH $200 TWIGS!!! That's a couple hundred bucks in sticks per season! It would be an embarassment to have a twenty dollar wooden Sher-wood nowadays. I officially will never be able to afford to have my kids in hockey. A pair of running shoes and shin guards is sure looking good right now. It ain't just Bettman that's killing the game folks.
Zamboni Driver is in a Bronco jacket. Good work. Net guy is old and takes too long to do maitenance. We're ready to start the second period and this guy is slowly making his way to do the Lethbridge goal. Sorochan wants to clean the crease but has an old man with ASS CRACK cleaning out the peg holes!!!
Just on a side note before we get to the 2nd period, WHERE THE HELL ARE OUR ALDERMEN AND MAYOR? They all talk about how important the Broncos are to the city and blah, blah, blah, but I have yet too see Sandy Larson or the aldermen at a hockey game! Jerrod Schafer will show up now and then but that's it. Sandy Larson will show up at the awards banquet, make a speech which will ooze of fake sincerity and then leave. Don't defend them by saying they're expanding the Civic Center to save the Broncos either. They're only doing that because our last mayor did nothing more than star in movies at the Rodeway Inn. This council just wants to make changes just for the sake of making changes. Everytime our mayor misses a Bronco game she puts another "arse" in Larson!
2nd Period:
Redenbach continues to beat Hunter on faceoffs. Seriously, Redenbach 5 Hunter 0
Shawn Mezei takes a roughing penalty to put the Broncos on the PP early. Broncos powerplay is the worst in the league. Horman and Hunter storm the goal, here comes Desloges, centering feed SCOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRESSSS!!! HOLY **** A POWERPLAY GOAL BY SWIFT CURRENT. IS THE UNIVERSE ABOUT TO IMPLODE ON ITSELF?
1-0 Swift Current
Desloges from Horman and Hunter. Tell me we didn't SCREW EVERETT ROTTEN ON THE LEAVITT/ANNESLEY DEAL.
Broncos are playing hard and out working Lethbridge. The big guns for the Canes have done nothing. Swift is outworking them and taking it to them.
Yellow Horn/Filewich/Pess are on the ice. They are cycling the puck but getting no shots on goal. Yellow Horn banks a shot off Rumsey's skate theeeeyyyy score. Yellow Horn gets the goal with the assists going to Pess, Filewich and the HORSESHOE UP HIS *****!!!
1-1
Great shift buy the Broncos right after the goal. Levi Nelson is a HOUSE OF FIRE! Broncos crash the goal, Murray, Brisebois and Nelson, NELSON SCOOOOOOORRRRESSSSS!!!! WHERE DID WE FIND THIS KID? . The Futrue looks good. Nelson, Bortis, Leovold, Wasmuth, Brisebois, Sauer. Everything's gonna be alright
Scored with Seabrook on the ice no less.
Nelson from Brisebois and Murray. Murray has done a fine job of saying BOOYAH to Darren Stocker tonite.
2-1 Swift
Trevor Peeters on the bench is not wearing the hat tonite. I know Trevor is the son of NHL legend Pete Peeters, but is it just me or does he look more like Mike Ridley?
Broncos dominate until late in the period when Brisebois gets that disease that makes you take dumb penalites at key moments. The same one that sidelined Leckovic tonite. Canes on the PP Yellow Horn finds Filewich, across the crease theeeeyyyy score. Why Yellow Horn missed the top prospect game is beyond me. 17 years old and leading the top junior aged league in North American in scoring. Filewich from the 1st Nation Sensation and Lammers to end the period.
2-2 tie
Penalties Brisbois, hooking then holding minutes later for Swift. Mezei for roughing, Kodman for holding for Lethbridge.
INTERMISSION:
Boring shoot out contest that no one ever wins. next.
Frozen t-shirt contest. Charlie Horse does a lap THROWING SHIRTS INTO THE CROWD. Did I not suggest that in the last recap? It's the contest where you have to put on a frozen t-shirt and run a race. We have a fat guy, a tall guy and a short guy. The FAT GUY WINS. He fires up the crowd as he crosses the finish. BEST INTERMISSION IN WEEKS! If they do something like that every game attendace will go up. It's the little things.
The old guy doing net maitenance takes forever. Again. Fans in sections M,N,O,P and parts of H get treated to more ass crack.
3rd Period:
I had a good feeling about this until 5:45 in when theeeeeeyyyyy score. Lethbridges fourth line just made Swift look like bantams. Kodman from Ruzicka and Ullrich.
3-2 Lethbridge
Broncos look deflated.
Lethbridges fourth line hits the ice again and theeeeyyyyyy score again. Who the hell are these guys? The Broncos made yellowhornfilewichpess and redenbachversteeglammers totally ineffective but Mike Ullrich, Neil Kodman and Martin Ruzicka are the death of them!?!?!? Broncs were playing so good. David Schulz needs to get pissed off and start throwing that 6'3 210 pound frame of his. If you put eggs in Schulz's shoulder pads at the start of the game, they'd still be intact after sixty minutes. He is too easy going. Why do linemen in football slap each other in the face? Why does Dion Phaneuf never smile? Forget about all the assault BS, but look at Todd Bertuzzi. That guy is a ball of rage. Pete Rose despite his gambling problems and all the other crap was one of the best athletes ever because he was always pissed off. An angry Schulz would be awesome.
4-2 Lethbridge
Thirty seconds later John Lammers spots Kris Versteeg. I'm not sure where the defense is but Versteeg skates out of the corner, makes a move on Kyle Moir, smiles at the girls in section H, strikes a pose for the cameras and scores. Good for Versteeg, ugly for the Broncos. Schulz wasn't on the ice for that one.
5-2 Lethbridge
Tyler Redenbach was announced as scoring the last goal. Either the hot dog I ate had weed in it or someone hit the Canadian room in the intermission.
Moir out, Peeters in. Mike Ridley is listening to the game online and yells out "THAT'S MY BOY!!!" (I'm joking and I apologize)
This was fun for two periods but the Broncos have given up. Oh ****, Marc Defoe on the ice with Redenbach's line. Theeeeeeeeyyyyy score. Versteeg again. Nice play by Lammers and Redenbach to set that one up.
6-2 Lethbridge.
FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT!!!
Michael Szcscachor and Mike Ullrich gear down. Ullrich looks hesitant, I don't think he wants to do this. Szcsachor opens up a TEXAS SIZED CAN OF WHOOP ASS!!! Ullrich was a big part of the Canes success and caps the night off with the Gordie Howe hat trick. Winner: Szcszachor Loser: Old people who hate the loud horn in the luxury boxes.
Let's wrap this up:
3 stars:
1. Leth, Neil Kodman (1 goal, 1 assist)
2. Leth, Kris Versteeg (2 goals)
3. SC, Levi Nelson (1st career goal)
Not sure if anyone else caught this but I SWEAR I HEARD KODMAN SAY F-*-*-K IN THE POST GAME SHOW. Anyone else catch that? Was it just the weed hot dogs?
Great game through two periods. Lethbridge will OWN the central unless Sutter out coaches them.
Willi$